How To Shift Focus For Positive Change

Anxiety Help BournemouthWelcome to Episode One of ‘Tuesday Choose Day’, my new inspirational weekly post.


My aim here is to inspire you to feel more positive and more confident within yourself to create the change you want to happen in your life.”





Today’s Inspiration To Brighten Your Day…


If you are feeling attracted to the idea of creating more positivity and fun in your life, I’m guessing that you might perhaps want your life to be different and better in some way?

So how clear are you about what you want?   Maybe you know what you don’t want, but you’ve not really given what you DO want a lot of thought?!  Most people tend to think a lot about what they don’t want – you know those things day in day out that generate frustration?  The thing is, when you focus on what you don’t want, you need to know that your mind attracts more of what you focus on.  For example, if you are ‘sick and tired’ of feeling stuck in your life in some way, then you will continue to feel stuck, listless, frustrated, even depressed because that’s where your focus is – and if you’re telling yourself you’re feeling sick and tired, you’ll likely get dogged by low energy and ailments too!  It makes sense when you think it about in this way, doesn’t it?

This ‘Chooseday’ is a perfect opportunity to choose to focus on what you DO WANT…


Here’s how to get started.

Take some time today to really think about the positive change you’d like to see in your life.  What do you want to be different and in what way?  To help you to get clear on what you want, imagine that as the sun rises on a new day, that a miracle has mysteriously happened and your challenges now have evaporated and that this miracle ripples positively into every aspect of your life… How will life be different now I wonder?  What might be a sign that you’ll be feeling better about things from now on?  What will do you differently?

As you imagine this vividly for yourself with feeling, you are creating a ‘movie or programme in your mind’.  If you play this often enough, you begin to send a clear message to your subconscious of what you truly want. 

You begin to shift focus away from the negative movie programming in your mind (which maybe you didn’t even realise you were playing!) and onto a lighter more positive frame of thinking which makes you more open to attracting the opportunities for change you seek.

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From the Wobbles and Worries Mailbox…


“I am in need of some help with anxiety about my 6 year old daughter who was very sick after eating a few days ago with a tummy bug and now seems to have negative associations with eating.
She puts a tiny bit of food in her mouth and tells me she is full.  Then she tries to gag.  This is so weird because she usually eats anything and I am starting to worry that this may develop into an eating disorder.   Do you have any ideas on the best way to handle this quickly please?”

A summary of my advice…

“It sounds like your little girl is worried that if she eats it will make her sick.  You’re right to suggest that she might be developing an unhealthy relationship with food. Don’t worry though, I believe you can turn it around quickly and simply. My advice to you is this.

Tell her gently that you understand that she might be feeling worried about eating food because she was sick after eating before.  Calmly explain to her that it wasn’t the food that made her sick and that tummies just get sick sometimes for a day or two.  You might give her examples of other ways her body might have been ill in the past for example, a typical head cold or ear ache.

I would really play it all down.  She will pick up on your anxiety and create issue that isn’t there at this stage.  Let her see you confidently eating in a relaxed way. Show her casually that you have a good relationship with food.  If she doesn’t want to eat much for a day or two, just go with it!  She can test for herself if the food makes her ill or not by eating a little then a bit more.  (You don’t need to tell her that she will work that out for herself!)  Once she starts a little and she is notices it is not making her sick, she will likely forget about it and go back to eating normally.”

If you’d like my advice with your particular wobble or worry,  simply click on the link here



Lisa Skeffington, Anxiety Expert – Anxiety Help Bournemouth

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